heyhey
its been long since i last post. attended adam khoo's im gifted programme. its in three days but all 13 hours each. till now i haven get all my slp replenish. still keep feeling slpy. they said alot of interesting ways of letting us get motivated. but why im i so useless. haix. i just cant seem to get the urgency. even i do it will only last for a short period of time. i really wish it could turn out right. jyjy yingxin. haix. ok shall say til here byebye^^ love love

heyhey
yesterday celebrated peggy's birthday at my hse. have a very fun time playing. and once agn HAPPY BIRTHDAY PEGGY!! <33 <33 hehes. it was a surprise party. hehes and she was surprise. hahas. lucky successful. hehes. i had a very fun time. wish the girls have a great time too. shall post some pictures^^


oh this cake is made by peggy, kelly and me. on tuesday. peggy should be eating this cake today i guess. hehheh.


kelly and bestie~~


the cake look so helpless. hahas


hehes. me and bestie.


me and kel. hehes all first timers at the cake deco.


hehes. thats yesterday. hahas. surprise~!!
heh~!! once agn. happy birthday bestie~!!!
ok. stop here. bye. lovelove

heyhey
its sunday today. wanted to do alot of things. but didnt do any yet. later must do. gogo yingxin!!! haix. tmr need go school for amath "test" dont feel like going but oh well. at least its quite late. so dun have to wake up early. so go bah. school reopening soon. haven do any file-ing. alot of worksheets lying around. must tidy up soon. if not difficult to study ler. gogo yingxin. tydy ws is quite easy. must do must do. if not u really slack the whole holiday ler. dun think too much. do one thing at a time. just dun do nothing can ler. ok^^ go go yingxin!! ok later i must tell myself to do something. today nth much to say. so shall stop here.
byee. lovelove


handsome handsome soo handsome~!!

heyhey!!
today woke up at 8am for english lesson. and feel like washing hair, so caused myself to be late. sry friends.but after we reached skool they say english teacher was not in skool. made me wake up early and travel to skool for nth. after waiting for an hour i think. the others went home, while some of us wait for sinyi to do a birthday card for yuxiang. and happy birthday yuxiang^^ did card and went home. while walking met a big puddle, as it was raining. which means i was hair for nth. cos the haor will still get dirtied by the rain agn. haix haix. oh ya puddle. eventhough my shoes ave no hole underneath but my socks was still wet, causing me to have wet feet all the way home. so uncomfortable. i usually like rain alot. but i only like it wen im dry. totally dry!!. haixhaix. but oh well.
gotten home and get a bath. wash hair agn. and realise my hair is not growing in length. i can feel it grew thicker but not longer. urgh!! i think i did not protect my hair well enough, so theres alot of broken hair or split ends, making the hair not able to grow in length. haix haix. hair hair pls grow longer. i wan to have long long hair agn, so i can always tie many different style! and pls dun wave. ok can wave but wave nicely. hahas
ok shall stop here wan to see any new songs to catch up. if not very out dated ler.
ok bye. lovelove!



end with usui!! he look hot with his hair up too<33333

HEYHEY!!!
hello blog^^
hehes. was a good girl just now. muhahaha did 3 math school papers. good job yingxin! was planing to take a nap while waiting for mummy to come back. but while lying on the bed suddenly pom. my mind keep thinking of all the math papers. so on the music and started. hahahaha and i did 3 papers. still left 1 but i think i lost 2 papers. dunnoe whr i chuck it to. haiz. see how tmr. talking about waiting. mummy's not back yet. im starving!! i wan go eat at ikea. pls dun come back and tell me eat ba zang. i eat that for 4 days alrdy i guess. hahas. she went bao zhong zi session at ah ma hse. now coming back. and its going to be 8 ler. eat ba zang for dinner is a 70% thing. but pls pls plssssss. i wan eat ikea food!! everyone is complaining about hungry. hahas. was hearing korkor complaining outside. hehehes. family thinks alike. hahas. did 3 papers so now very happy. ((:

hees. before that was watching kaichou wa maid sama anime and manga. USUI IS SOOO HANDSOME!! (his the main lead.) his such a caring guy a sweet guy and always thinks for misaki. (this other main lead) soooo cute tgt la they two. but they just dun admit. haix haix. but USUI is handsome to the max!! haha. i wish my boyfriend will look like him. tall tall built built but not too muscular, nice nice and sometime will joke make u shy, and always appear at the right time, saving misaki from danger,so tough by him, somemore his is good at cooking, good at studies, good at fighting, good at spots, basically everything! omg!! fall in love with him<3333 hahas. hua chi towards a non-living thing. hehes

ok shall watch tele now. bye. lovelove.

hey blog!
shall do a quick post. need to go to school soon. today woke a little too early so have some extra time. going to have chem and bio mcq lvl test later. dont think i will do well. didnt really study. but oh well. i shall just go for it then. i must really start working hard. if not i also dunt know how. wish me luck! ok. end here for now.
bye. lovelove

hey blog!!
here to post. just came back from band bbq. missed all the juniors. they are so cute. hahas. i think band bbq is quite short this year dunnoe why. usually after the bbq will be very late but this year about 8 ++ finish ler. hahas saw their new band tee. is white. quite plain not too bad. but didnt tot that they would chose white. but white good. won so warm. heard that they going to esplanade for concert tmr wish they will have a fun time^^

just now at ss lesson. ms khalidal said some encouraging words. made me really wanted to work hard. but its like even though i really want too my body and mind just keep rejecting. its really making me crazy. everytime wen i have test i will think why do i have test?? life is alrdy very short and i spend all my youth on studying. shouldnt school be a place for moral values and teaching us how to cope with the society and not teaching u how to think wat the Cambridge ppl wan to see in ur answer scrips?? im really puzzled. for now in my sec school life all i learn is how to understand questions and try to do the best way to get my marks. even though we have some cme lessons. but its only like telling us wat other ppl are doing and wat is it about. they didnt really tell us wat to do to have this morals. but all being taught are how to feel for the markers. whether our handwriting is too ugly or difficult for the markers to see and mark. or wat words are missing that will deprive us of our marks. everything is about marks and results. and im getting really tired. i feel like just give up. just do nth and stay at home. wanting to close myself for the world. so that the will be no more competition. and i can live the life i wan. just play and sight see and enjoy my everyday life. why does things need money?? if there is no money i won have to work. and if i won have to work, i won need to get good grades, if i won need to have good grades i won have to study.

i would still wan to go to school so that i could get to new other ppl. and noe about different ppl with different attitude. i also wish to learn different moral values so that i will be a better person that benefit myself and others. i dont think our future should e determined by that piece of paper. moreover. not everyone can cope with stress. maybe they feel very stress that day on exam and didnt do well?? thats not really fair. but it can be said that we should not let emotions get on the way. but i just feel that spending much of my time getting good results is not really wat i wanted. somemore not everyone will really use wat they have learnt. in other words, studying so hard now is just for us to get a pass to enter the good jobs. cos not everything u learnt is relevant to ur job.

ok said much. good portal to release my feelings. hahas
bye. love love

hi blog!!
hehes. watching video. waiting for it to load. so decided to post. hmm.. yesterday took nap quite late. so woke up at 8pm after dinner cant slp. i think only fall aslp at 1pm?? hahas. so today woke up at 1. 12 hrs of slp. hehes. maybe thats why i feel that today pass so fast. actually should be going to kor's gf bday bbq. but very lazy go. somemore dun really know much ppl there. so didnt go.

hehes. having career quest on mon. im alrdy nervous. i think i look damn old in whatever i planned to wear. somemore i got tis beyond my age, mature face. which really piss me off. why i have such a old face??!! urgh!! really envy those have very kiddish face. although they may not get treated seriously at times but they look young always. nowadays isnt everyone wan to look young. haiz. but i got this old face. make me cant wear too mature stuffs as i will look damn old. its like even just wearing tee shirt and shorts i alrdy like can pass for a 18?? when im like 16. haiz. always ppl tot im alrdy in poly or so. and whenever somebody guess my age they always got the older. no one guess me in a younger age. i think if i really make up. i can pass a 20. hahas. somemore im not a small size girl. im wat my good frens says curvy but to me im just fat, big size. haiz. always like that. i think if im smaller in size maybe i will look younger?? hahas. maybe shorter and very skinny. so even with my face i still look young. haha. some more when you have a mature face. ppl always tot ur fierce so i have to try to keep a smile frequently so that i dun get said by ppl that im having a bad mood or throwing tantrums. but always having a smile is a good thing. but it sometime bad as ppl may feel that u treat everything as a joke. as u keep making a smile. so get misunderstood sometimes. haix.but dun everyone get misunderstood at times. so it ok. haha
ok i think my video is done. gtg
bye. lovelove

hi blog!!
hehes didnt blog for a few days ler i guess. its holiday with inverted comas. yup although everyone in pri and sec school having fun holidays. having camp. im still having lessons everyday. i think the only holiday i have left is the last wk. wish nth goes wrong. and rite after school holidays. we are bombaded with mid year. not even any recovering into school day time is given. is just like after u woke up from a very long slp ur sent to war. ur body have not even get use to the equipments or the timing ur sent to ur death. but oh well that why teacher keep saying we are not really having holidays. the real holiday will be after o lvl bah. i wish it could just come now.
hai. just came back from skool had mid year english oral. i think i did not do very well. i cant express myself well enough in english. used to mandarin. haix. tried to work very very hard then. wish i can. go yingxin. ok shall end here.
bye. love love

heyheyhey
its friday alrdy. 3 more days to chinese o lvl!! oh gosh im soo nervous even just thinking of it. i wonder what will happen on the actual day. pls bless me that i du get too nervous until i forgot things or get mind block. pls bless me!!!jyjy yingxin. u must not freak out that day. stay calm and just get over and done with. i really dont want to take it agn at end of year. gogogo!! its getting over. just a few more steps. hang on ok!! hehes. shall write till here. wish everyone good luck too^^
bye. lovelove

hello hello
heys!! here to blog. hehes. yesterday forgot to blog. fell aslp hehes. hmm. today i the last day of skool to many. cos holidays coming. yay!! happy for those having. me. sec 4. got o lvl to study for!! urgh. so annoying. how i wish this time will nv come.i dun wan to face it!! just let me remain young forever can?? haix. see how humans are weird species. when they ae really young they will wish to get old faster. but now when they are old they wish they will remain young forever. although im not old lar. just 16. but i think thats the worst. ur caught in between. ur not too old for many fun things. and ur not young for many childish fun things too. its frustrating. yet you cant do anything about it. just wish it will all over soon. haix haix haix. i wish o lvl coluld just vroom pass me. i dun wan to endure all these hardships. maybe to some ppl study is fun. but to me study is ok but the exam part and the taking reults part. is hell. soo scary and nervous. especially before the exam and before taking result. i think i will get high lvl of adrenal rush and just faint off. hahas. just the tought of it give me creeps. haix haix. really dun wan to face it. how???
somemore if 2012 is really true then i was just 18. in my poly or jc yrs. study like mad and have to die ?? without even having any big change. like be a rich woman. hahas or even married. and im dead. its not worth it. but haix haix haix. dunnoe la. but its really quite stupit lo. 18 my life was just about to turn into clubs, parties and stuff. but im going to die. hahas. and all my 10+ yrs of study have gone to waste. so why im i have thinking so much and worrying so much for?
but maybe no matter how i try i cant get good marks how?? im separated from my friends agn how?? haix haix. im so worried. urgh. i feel that im getting older by the minute. nono i should play some game and make myself more childish. enjoy life. hahas
ok stop here. bye. love love

hello hello

hehes. here to post agn. suddenly feel like playing audi. hahas. now patching. so can blog awhile. hehes. em.. wat should i say?? today quite ok. skool was ok but erm... aiya nth to say. my mind thinking of audi and television. so cant think of wat to write. hmm.. hmm.. aiya nth to write la. ok. im gona end here. hehes.

byee love love

hello~!
today here to post agn. hahas. now was suppose to do my homework. but agn don feel like doing. hahas. this few days will be chinese chinese chinese. haix. wan watch tv oso no show for me to watch. nono not no show is no show that i feel like watching hahas. so decided to use com instead. feel very bloated now. keep eating eating eating. i think im getting fatter and fatter. hehes. eat slp eat slp. haix. just feel like shutting my mind dun do any thing just stay and daydream or just slp throughout the day. i think maybe im feeling the pressure of the chinese o lvl. its about 6days away only. i wan to do it once and for all. go yingxin~!! haix. whenever encouraging myself im afraid that i give myself to much hope. oh wat should i do??today feeling quite tired cant seem to focus. wish tmr will be better. fight fight yingxin!
ok end here. bye.love love

HI!
im back blogging. i dun know why. but suddenly have the urge. ok im those 3mins kind of person. ok what im a talking about. but oh well. wanted to start on homework. but land my hands on the com instead hahas. thinking a lot lately. and feeling that im going crazy. i get upset by minor things. im weird very weird. and i think that i made everyone dislike me, that im a person hard to communicate with. oh i dunknow. i just feel people get pressurized by me. or is it that i get pressurise myself?? many doubts. maybe im panicking looking at all my friends, classmates moving on. im sacred that i will be left behind. will i?? writing this make me feel my adrenal rush. im worried ok im very worried. im scared that what happen during psle will happen agn. i get separated from my friends, becos i didnt get the same results. but i whenever tell myself to study. its always i let myself down everytime. i alrdy forgotten whats the feeling to accomplish what u have told urself to do, as i have disappoint myself everytime. but why dun i just having hopes on everything?? i hope that i can get results i want. i hope that i will pass all my tests. i hope that i will finish every homework i was given. but everytime i disappoint myself agn and agn. until now i alrdy forgotten the feeling of accomplishing something. haix. im werid. i cared but i act like i dun.

teachers, people, are always saying u have to believe urself and u work towards it. but i always believe myself. but the problem is i cant make myself works towards it. i just cant always do my homeworks firsthand i just cant. and it hurts when the people around u get what ever they have work hard for. u just get disappoint by urself. and ask urself. why cant u just work harder??!! but how many people can really understand that i just cant make myself work hard. i try many ways. give myself timetable encourage myself. but every time i end up doing nth i plan. and see my friends moving on. always get left behind feels bad. i dun wish to excel or be better then others. i just wish that i can be with them on the same step. so i won be alone. is it possible??
wow. i wrote alot today. haha back to the optimistic me. im weird i have two sides. hahas. maybe becos i just like to believe in myself. although im always disappointed by it. and always when u give urself too much hope the harder u will fall when u know it. haix. but what to do thats me^^
ok shall end here. love love

long time no post.
but well im very lazy here. and i think im getting lazy and lazier. but haix. and today 1st day of skool. ok not very good or very very bad lar. but band was not very good. didnt play well. kena told. haix. think im not a good leader bah. after i took over like i make the section bad. haix haix. but ok im gona step down soon. so just wish our section can get better?? wish so wish so. hahas. haix haix. actually should do my maths homework. but very lazy now. too tired to do now. oh ya next wk is alrdy camp. wish i will have a good time thn. wish myself luck bah. tmr gt maths and chem and wat?? oh ya phys. but i don have so can rest.not bad not bad. ok my eyes wan close le. i should rest le. ok go le go le. byes. wish my day will e better tmr^^